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When I was young and discovering and exploring my sexuality I found that I would fall in love very easily and I even thought a kiss meant I was bound to that person in a sort of committed way. Sure enough I'd get hurt time and time again.

Deciding I'd had enough of all this pain I successfully combated my feelings.

So successful was I that I didn't see what I had actual done. With all the pain in my early life it had helped me lay a foundation so solid for 'My Wall' to be erected upon.

Growing up and controlling my feelings became natural for me and with the loss of loved ones and bad relationships I discovered that 'My Wall' was now firmly in place.

Now and again 'My Wall' dose come down and I'm able to love.

But sometimes - just sometimes, I think is it really worth it.

Strewth, if i hear that line again "I don't judge anyone" I think I'll have to go lay down.

The truth is we all judge, we can't help but judge, it's in our chemistry our fibre our very make up. It's our nature to judge.

It's what helps us make choices, it gives us opinions even if some are silent. We judge, we're human, no big deal.



Quote: "EVEN NO CHOICE IS A CHOICE"

hi Journal, I'm back for a bit.

Don't look at me like that. I know you looked on silently - as always. I know you would have said something - if you could.

You know we even have her 'input' right here among our pages, she checked out a poem for me when i was knackered --- yep thats the one, you recognized it because it was unusually perfect, thanks Journal - kick me when i'm down.